How do I give myself time without feeling lazy?
“Get up at 5am to journal, meditate, work out and make your vegetable smoothie so you can be successful!!!”
“If you’re not hustling, you’re not growing!!!”
“This guy became a multi-millionaire at age 23 and you should too!”
Scroll through social media for a few minutes and you’re bound to come across messaging like the above. We are in a society that perpetually wants more and they want it faster. It is easy to slip into feelings of inferiority when everyone else seems to be accomplishing, accomplishing, accomplishing.
So, the question of the century is, “How do I give myself time without feeling lazy?”
1) Realize that hustling usually isn’t the answer.
Sure, sometimes you’ve gotta push yourself and sprint through the finish -- but that’s not MOST of the time. Rest can go a long way. Regrouping, relaxation, & refocusing can be just as productive, if not moreso, than pushing yourself to burnout.Realize that hustling usually isn’t the answer. Sure, sometimes you’ve gotta push yourself and sprint through the finish -- but that’s not MOST of the time. Rest can go a long way. Regrouping, relaxation, & refocusing can be just as productive, if not moreso, than pushing yourself to burnout.
2) Don’t feel the need to apologize or explain time you took for yourself.
Personal story: Last Monday (after I’d worked extra that weekend), my boyfriend got up at 6am and was at work by 7. When he came home mid-morning to grab something, he found me still in my pajamas.
I was quick to try and explain it away -- “It looks like I’m playing on my phone but I swear I’m responding to e-mails!”
He chuckled and said, “Babe, I don’t care what you’re doing! You don’t need to explain anything to me. Rest if you need to.”
Oh. (Now if only I had given myself that permission instead of waiting for it externally…)
3) Make it part of who you are.
My family and close friends know that I don’t work on Sundays. It’s just what I do now. They also know I don’t work past 6pm. It’s just what I do now. I also check in with my body before I go to the gym - “Would working out make me feel better today? Or would it make me feel more exhausted?” That little internal conversation is... just what I do now. All of these habits are ingrained now because I decided to make them a part of what I do.
4) Ignore all the people hustling and swirling around you. Be careful of “grass is always greener” syndrome. It’s easy to see how other people are living and assume you need to live the same way. You don’t! Your friend might get up at 5am every day and you might decide you need more sleep than that. Your spouse might work out 6 days a week and you might decide 3 days a week is plenty for you. Your kid’s teacher might respond to e-mails at 10pm, but you can decide to wait until normal business hours to tend to your own inbox.
We’ve all got our methods for getting through life and they’re all going to be different.
So, Love, remember there is a difference between laziness and restfulness. If you are taking much-needed time for yourself -- to sleep, to process, to journal, to introvert, to recharge, to make a decision, to take a nap -- YOU ARE NOT LAZY. Your batteries need to be charged regularly - not once or twice a year.
You are worthy of the time it takes to be a healthy human. Take what you need. Some days you’ll need more time than others and that is ok. Give yourself time. ❤️
Love, Kristen